Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Time: The Ultimate Cursed Treasure

Time is a funny thing.  We are either waiting on it to pass, trying desperately to hang on to what has come and gone, or trying to slow down the inevitable. I am simultaneously doing all of these things for different aspects of my life, and I do not think that mine is a singular experience.  While I am grateful for the time I have been given, as I have a lot to accomplish, I would rather hit the fast forward button sometimes.  However, other times I would rather go back and the rewind button would be the most attractive. I want more time, but I would like to be able to pick and choose where that time would go.

I look at pictures from last Christmas and New Year's time and I can't believe it has been a year already, it all seems like it just happened, and that it happened forever ago.Sometimes I can't believe this last year has even really happened.  It is all so surreal: finishing up classes, wisdom teeth, cancer, and kidney stones.  Travels, goals, and learning discipline.  Crushing, dating, falling in love, staying in love, saying good bye to love so that other people can have the chance to feel the amazing powers of the gospel...and SO many tears...how could all that have happened already? Now here we are, at a screeching halt. Waiting.  Waiting for interviews, for exercise to take its effect, for paperwork, for doctors appointments, for every precious letter, for dreams to come true, for good days to come, and for the hard days to pass.  My Patriarchal Blessing says specifically that I must be patient, so I'll be patient.

You're move.